{"id":3515,"date":"2025-07-06T10:00:00","date_gmt":"2025-07-06T10:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/cafeconmelli.com\/?p=3515"},"modified":"2025-07-05T23:16:20","modified_gmt":"2025-07-05T23:16:20","slug":"finalizar-adopcion-juez","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cafeconmelli.com\/eng\/finalizar-adopcion-juez\/","title":{"rendered":"We Said \u201cYes, We Do\u201d\u2026 In Front of the Judge"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Five months passed from that Tuesday when we got the phone call that sent us running to the hospital,  the one that announced our daughter\u2019s birth (<a href=\"https:\/\/cafeconmelli.com\/eng\/como-una-llamada-nos-convirtio-en-padres-nuestra-historia-de-adopcion\/\">I share more about that [here]<\/a>) to the day we sat in court in front of the judge.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Five months of adapting, of getting to know ourselves as individual parents, of learning how to be a couple with a baby, of internal and external questions, of discovering a new kind of exhaustion\u2026 and of discovering a new kind of love.\nThe kind of love that makes your own self take a back seat, because for the first time, there\u2019s someone in the world who takes priority, who depends on you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-nuestros-primeros-meses-como-familia\"><strong>Our First Months as a Family<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Those first few months at home felt surreal. Everything that had happened the month before felt like a fairytale.\nThat first week, we had a hard time letting go of our <em>touch time routine.<\/em>. We pretty much carried her all the time, <em>kangaroo-style.<\/em>The <em>baby carrier<\/em> quickly became essential.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">There were no more machines, no alarms, no hospital gowns, it was just the three of us and our dog at home.\nBut somehow, that first week we still measured her belly, checked her temperature, and watched her while she slept, just to make sure she was breathing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It was a time of learning. Learning her rhythm, decoding every little sound and need. And, like any first-time mom, I was also learning about myself, wondering if I was doing it right, listening to that quiet maternal instinct as it began to speak, creating routines and systems I\u2019d never thought about before, and learning how to balance our time between being parents and being partners.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I remember that, at the beginning, I had to adjust to the fact that my husband was a very hands on, committed father.\nMy grandmother would tell me how lucky I was that he changed diapers, that back in her days, that wasn\u2019t common. And I saw it as completely normal. She was our daughter, after all.\nStill, I won\u2019t lie, there were times when we had silly disagreements about the baby, and part of me wished he wasn\u2019t so involved.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">For example, when it came to feeding, we were incredibly blessed that my sister donated breast milk for the baby.\nAfter we were discharged from the NICU, our daughter was exclusively on breast milk for the first three months, and her growth was amazing. During the day, when we saw my sister, she would nurse her, and at night, we would thaw the milk she had given us and feed it to her in a bottle.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Well\u2026 in those mid night feedings, when you\u2019re half-asleep and half-awake, I remember my husband and I would always argue about how warm the milk should be. And in my head I\u2019d think: \u201cWhy is he waking up? He should just let me handle it. I\u2019m the mom.\u201d\nThree years later, with our second child, our rutine was different and my inner dialogue had changed: \u201cHe should wake up\u2026 he\u2019s the dad too.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-la-ultima-visita-del-home-study\"><strong>The Last Home Study Visit<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I remember our first home visit was a few weeks after the birth. Since our baby was born premature, the social worker came to the hospital. We talked a little about how we were feeling as new parents and what our routine was like with the baby.\nBut at that point, there wasn\u2019t much to say, she was still in the NICU, and our interactions with her were limited.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But this time, the last visit, we had already been home for a few weeks. The goal of this visit was to see how we were adjusting as a family, to share about our pediatrician visits, her development, and how we were doing as a family unit.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I remember sitting down for what felt like part interview, part therapy. I\u2019m not sure how to describe it. One of those conversations where you feel like you\u2019re opening up, but still thinking twice about how you say things so they come out the way you really mean them.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It was a bit of an emotional goodbye. I had grown very fond of our social worker. She had been with us from the beginning of the process, knew our story, and had shared in the joy of this journey with us.\nBut I won\u2019t lie... I was happy to know that this was our final visit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-los-comentarios-de-la-gente\"><strong>People's questions and comments.<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">At first, not many people knew we were pursuing adoption. And once our baby arrived, we were blessed to receive so much love from family and friends. But with that also came conversations and comments, some beautiful, others more uncomfortable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The most common reaction was genuine curiosity, people wanting to understand how everything had happened. Other times, without meaning to and I know they didn\u2019t mean harm people said things that upset me.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Like, for example:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>\u201cYou\u2019ll see, now that you\u2019ve adopted, you\u2019ll probably get pregnant and finally have a baby of your own.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And I\u2019d smile, quietly annoyed, and reply: <em>\u201cI already have my own baby.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Another common one:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>\u201cWhy can\u2019t you have children of your own? You should\u2019ve tried fertility treatments.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And I\u2019d think: <em>Eso no es problema tuyo&#8230;<\/em> But I\u2019d take a deep breath and say: <em>\u201cWe liked this path better.\u201d<\/em>.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I have so many stories like that. Comments I know weren\u2019t meant to hurt, but that showed me part of my journey would also be about gently educating others.\nHelping change the narrative.\nRealizing that people who haven\u2019t walked this road can\u2019t see it the way I do. And wanting, in some small way, to show that adoption is not a last resort, it\u2019s a beautiful way to build a family born from love.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-nos-sentamos-frente-al-juez\"><strong>We Sat in Front of the Judge<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And finally, the day came. It was our first time in court, a totally new experience. We were joined by our attorney and my family. We entered the courtroom, gave our information, and sat down to wait for our turn. We felt a mix of nerves and excitement, trying to take it all in\u2026 while feeding the baby at the same time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">After about 30 minutes, they called us in. We all entered the room and sat around a large table, us on one side, our family on the other, and the judge in front of us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">She began to speak. She told us how much she enjoyed handling adoption cases. She explained that adoption is forever, read us a few legal statements\u2026 and then she asked:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\u201cDo you accept this baby as your daughter for life?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">With tears in our eyes and a lump in our throats, we answered:<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">\"Yes, WE DO\"<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">In between applauses and tears, we signed the paperwork. It was such an emotional moment.\nWe had already accepted being a family since that very first meeting with the agency, and then again that night we met her in the NICU. The very first moment we saw her.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">She was our daughter, and we would love her forever.\nWe didn\u2019t need a judge\u2019s ruling to feel that, but having it made the legal part complete, and gave us a deep sense of peace. One that felt like the final seal on a story that had begun with a decision rooted in unconditional love.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-de-mayo-a-enero-elegimos-el-amor-una-y-otra-vez\"><strong>From May to January: Choosing Love, Again and Again<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">From that conversation in May, (<a href=\"https:\/\/cafeconmelli.com\/eng\/mi-camino-a-la-maternidad\/\">I share more about that [here]<\/a>) when we decided to walk the path of adoption, to that January day when we sat before the judge, we lived a story that transformed us, that taught us so much, and that made our dream of becoming parents come true.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It wasn\u2019t a straight or easy path, but it was filled with love, the waiting, the uncertainty, the phone call that changed everything, the days in the hospital, the quiet moments, the sleepless nights, the first smiles, the questions from others\u2026 and the answers we slowly found as we walked this road.&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I wouldn\u2019t change a thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Grateful to have you here, heart to heart.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\" id=\"h-melli\">Melli<\/h2>\n\n\n<figure class=\"wp-block-post-featured-image\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" width=\"852\" height=\"640\" src=\"https:\/\/cafeconmelli.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/PHOTO-2025-07-05-19-14-45.jpg\" class=\"attachment-post-thumbnail size-post-thumbnail wp-post-image\" alt=\"\" style=\"object-fit:cover;\" srcset=\"https:\/\/cafeconmelli.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/PHOTO-2025-07-05-19-14-45.jpg 852w, https:\/\/cafeconmelli.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/PHOTO-2025-07-05-19-14-45-300x225.jpg 300w, https:\/\/cafeconmelli.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/PHOTO-2025-07-05-19-14-45-768x577.jpg 768w, https:\/\/cafeconmelli.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/PHOTO-2025-07-05-19-14-45-16x12.jpg 16w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 852px) 100vw, 852px\" \/><\/figure>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Pasaron cinco meses desde aquel martes en que recibimos la llamada que nos har\u00eda correr al hospital, la que nos anunci\u00f3 el nacimiento de nuestra hija (te cuento sobre eso aqu\u00ed), hasta el d\u00eda en que ten\u00edamos la cita en la corte para sentarnos frente al juez. Cinco meses de adaptaci\u00f3n, de conocernos como padres [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3518,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[21],"tags":[25,23,30,27,28,24,26],"class_list":["post-3515","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-maternidad-por-adopcion","tag-adopcion-de-bebes-en-estados-unidos","tag-adoption","tag-adoption-process","tag-adoptive-parents","tag-domestic-adoption","tag-infant-domestic-adoption","tag-maternidad-por-adopcion"],"blocksy_meta":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.6.1 (Yoast SEO v27.7) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Dijimos \u201cs\u00ed, aceptamos\u201d\u2026 frente al juez - Cafe con Melli<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Desde la decisi\u00f3n en mayo hasta la audiencia en enero, te cuento c\u00f3mo vivimos el proceso de adopci\u00f3n: NICU, primeros meses como familia y el momento de decir &quot;s\u00ed, aceptamos&quot; frente al juez.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/cafeconmelli.com\/eng\/finalizar-adopcion-juez\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dijimos \u201cs\u00ed, aceptamos\u201d\u2026 frente al juez\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Desde la decisi\u00f3n en mayo hasta la audiencia en enero, te cuento c\u00f3mo vivimos el proceso de adopci\u00f3n: NICU, primeros meses como familia y el momento de decir &quot;s\u00ed, aceptamos&quot; frente al juez.\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/cafeconmelli.com\/eng\/finalizar-adopcion-juez\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Cafe con Melli\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2025-07-06T10:00:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/cafeconmelli.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/PHOTO-2025-07-05-19-14-45.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"852\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"640\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Melli\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Melli\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"7 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cafeconmelli.com\\\/finalizar-adopcion-juez\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cafeconmelli.com\\\/finalizar-adopcion-juez\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Melli\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cafeconmelli.com\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/ab88d496f5ec9a0d6ed001ee01d4e943\"},\"headline\":\"Dijimos \u201cs\u00ed, aceptamos\u201d\u2026 frente al juez\",\"datePublished\":\"2025-07-06T10:00:00+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cafeconmelli.com\\\/finalizar-adopcion-juez\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":1450,\"commentCount\":0,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cafeconmelli.com\\\/#organization\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cafeconmelli.com\\\/finalizar-adopcion-juez\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cafeconmelli.com\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2025\\\/07\\\/PHOTO-2025-07-05-19-14-45.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"adopcion de bebes en estados unidos\",\"adoption\",\"adoption process\",\"adoptive parents\",\"domestic adoption\",\"infant domestic adoption\",\"maternidad por adopcion\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Maternidad por adopcion\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/cafeconmelli.com\\\/finalizar-adopcion-juez\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cafeconmelli.com\\\/finalizar-adopcion-juez\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/cafeconmelli.com\\\/finalizar-adopcion-juez\\\/\",\"name\":\"Dijimos \u201cs\u00ed, aceptamos\u201d\u2026 frente al juez - 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