The call that made us parents: our adoption story

There are moments that change your life forever. Ours came through a phone call on an ordinary Thursday. My husband had picked me up from work, and as usual, we were driving home. When all of the sudden, a call comes in on my cell phone. It was the adoption agency. My heart raced as I answered.

On the other end of the call were the agency director and our social worker. Immediately they asked me if I was with my husband, I then knew our lives were about to change. I didn’t say a word, but my body language gave it away, and my husband understood: something big was coming. I put the call on speaker...

They told us a birth mother had seen our video… and had chosen us. From that moment on, everything became a blur. I stopped hearing for a second, everything went fuzzy. I remember staring out the car window, watching the road and the passing cars, the exact spot where we were, the feeling in my chest. But I can't recall the whole conversation, the only thing I remember is that they would email us the details.

When we hung up, I told my husband we should go straight to my parents’ house. We parked, and I jumped out of the car and ran inside to hug my mom. I didn’t have much information to share, but I needed a hug from her. She had been waiting for that call just as much as we had. The next day was my dad’s birthday, so we didn’t tell him anything yet. We decided this news would be his birthday gift.

After that, we went home and read every word of the email. It included the birth mother’s medical records, details about the pregnancy, her own health and family history, and the contract outlining the estimated costs expected for the process. 

We had 24 hours to accept or decline the match. But honestly, there wasn’t much to think about. Even though we had expected this process to take about a year,I share more about that [here]just three months after our initial appointment, we finally had a real date to look forward to. So that very night, we signed the documents.

Full of Emotions and Surprises

While we were going over the contract, we got another call from our social worker. She gave us more details about how everything had happened. The birth mother had seen our video, and one of the things she loved most was that we came from a big Latino family. She also mentioned how much she loved the song we had chosen, a song about new beginnings. 🎧 You can listen to it [here].

We hadn’t listen to that song before, we actually found it while putting the video together. And we loved it too.

At the end of the call, she told us the baby was due in mid-October… and that it would be a boy. We had already picked out the name from the moment we began dreaming about our family, so that night we just let ourselves imagine his little face, and what it would be like to hold him in our arms.

I called my mom to tell her what we learned from the social worker, and she said: “Oh, how wonderful, another little boy!” My sister had two boys, and my husband’s brother had a boy too. There were no girls anywhere in the family.

Change of Plans (It’s a Girl!)

The next morning, I got another call from our social worker. This time, she sounding quite embarrassed, she began by apologizing. There had been a misunderstanding. My heart stopped for a moment. Then she said, “I made a mistake... it’s a girl. I hope this doesn’t change your decision.” I took a deep breath, laughed, and told her there was absolutely no problem. Boy or girl, we were equally happy. In fact, I said, we had always dreamed of having one of each, so if both came at once, even better!

So, before heading to work, I decided to stop by my mom’s house to share the news in person. I knew she had always dreamed of having a granddaughter. The look of pure joy on her face will forever live in my memory. And right then and there, we told my dad that his birthday gift was on its way with hair bows, dolls, and all of that.

In all honesty, we wanted to tell everyone. And while we did share the news with our loved ones, we also knew we had to be super cautious. Adoption was new territory for most people around us. Not everyone understood how complex the process could be, and there was always the possibility that the birth mother might change her mind. 

That’s when I remembered a piece of advice I had read somewhere: “For every person you tell the good news to, you’ll have to tell twice as many if it doesn’t happen.”

A Message from above

Around that time, I got a call from one of my cousins who didn’t know anything about the adoption. He told me he’d had a dream where our grandmother (who passed away when I was just two years old) had told him I was going to have a daughter. He knew we had been trying to start a family, but he had no idea we were already in the middle of the adoption process. 

Our grandmother had passed away in the month of October, the same month our daughter was expected to be born. Right then, I knew it was a sign. So we decided to give our daughter as a middle name my grandmothers name.

The blind date that would change everything

The week after that call, we traveled to Venezuela to attend my husband’s brother’s wedding. Once we got there, we shared the news with his side of the family. I remember my father in law telling me something that stuck with me: “Did you know that children are the ones who choose their parents? They always find their way to them.” I thought it was so beautiful and right on point. I still remember that moment clearly.

Just a few days after we returned, we had our first meeting with the birth mother. It felt like a blind date. I was so nervous, I didn’t know what to say or even what to wear. We met for breakfast, along with the social worker. 

To my surprise, everything felt so natural. We talked a little about everything, answered her questions, shared our hopes and plans as future parents, and emotionally connected with her. She told us that when she watched our video, she felt this baby had always been meant for us. That day, she also shared that she would like me to be present for the birth. And without hesitation, I immediatlely said yes. 

The conversation felt very warm, honest, and hopeful. That first meeting happened during the second week of August, on a Tuesday.

Two weeks later, on our way to the hospital

Exactly two weeks later, we received a photo, it was the 32 week ultrasound. Everything seemed to be going well, but that very same day, at around 4 p.m., I got an urgent call from our social worker. The birth mother had a complication and was on her way to the hospital. Our baby would be born that same day. She recommended us to leave immediately, the hospital drive was about two hours.

I ran like I had never ran before, straight to my husband’s workplace, which was about a kilometer from mine. I don’t know why, but instead of calling him, I just took off running. When I finally got there, completely out of breath and barely able to speak because of all emotions, I managed to tell him that our daughter was on her way. We rushed home, grabbed a few things, picked up my mom, and hit the road.

A gesture full of love

Halfway there, I got a call from an unknown number. It was the birth mother. She asked if we were on our way and told me she was already at the hospital, getting ready for a C-section. She said they were waiting for us and that she had given the hospital instructions to let me in so I could be with her. I was speechless. I just thanked her from the bottom of my heart and told her we were almost there.

We arrived at the hospital around 7 p.m. Once again, I ran, this time inside the hospital, without getting much information. My husband and my mom found me just as a nurse came out to speak with me. They hadn’t been able to wait any longer. The baby had already been born.

So, we asked her to take us to see the birth mother. When we entered the room, the first thing she asked was: “Have you seen your baby girl yet?” I walked over to her, took her hand, and, full of emotion, told her no, not yet. That we wanted to make sure she was okay first.

When we met our daughter

We left her room and were taken to the neonatal intensive care unit. And there she was, my baby girl, so tiny, inside an incubator. She had been born healthy, but she needed to stay a few more weeks to grow and develop. The nurses informed us that she would likely remain in the hospital for at least four weeks.

Honestly, it all felt like a dream. I was filled with love, gratitude, and lost of emotions. 

That night, in that hospital, the little person who would change our lives forever was born, the one who made our biggest dream come true.

What I didn’t know was that the next 48 hours would be an emotional rollercoaster…

Grateful to have you here, heart to heart.

Melli